The Great Bull Dyke Labesian Goon Contest
IN SEARCH OF THE WORLD’S GREATEST GOON
Rules for Entry:
Send video(s) and/or photo(s) of a goon, labesian or bull dyke with your name and contact information to email@example.com
You can enter a picture you find online, but it has to be an unknown non-celebrity person.
Do NOT confront the goon. ET Williams and the Common Sense Nation will not be held responsible for any injury if you confront a goon. You will get your ass beat.
Final Four will be announced by judges and then Common Sense Nation will vote on the winner. DEADLINE TO SUBMIT IS MARCH 1, WHEN WE ANNOUNCE THE FINAL FOUR. WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED FRIDAY, MARCH 3, 2017
What is a goon: a woman who thinks she’s a man and is unattractive by any heterosexual standard.
Hints: if she give you dap or a fist bump, she is a goon.
If she has a wallet with a chain on it, she is a goon.
If she sits with her legs open, she is a goon.
If she wears Dickie’s khaki pants or birkenstocks, she is a goon.
If she has a buzz cut, she is a goon.
If you have to fight her like you fight a man, she is a goon.
(1) Donald Trump
(2) Hillary Clinton
(3) Mac Daddy Ice
Prize: A heavyweight championship goon belt, previously owned by Sally Kohn and Dean Hutton.
Recommended Goon Locations:
Walmart, Future Farmers of America (FFA), ROTC, auto mechanic shops, Krispy Kreme, late night at Denny’s, any all-you-can-eat-buffet, swap meets, county fair, tractor pull, etc.
SEND ALL PHOTOS AND VIDEOS TO
By sending us your photo(s) or video(s) you acknowledge:
ET Williams has permission to use the likeness in a photograph, video, or other digital media (“photo”) in any and all of its publications, including web-based publications, without payment or other consideration.
You understand and agree that all photos will become the property of ET Williams and will not be returned.
You hereby irrevocably authorize ET Williams to edit, alter, copy, exhibit, publish, or distribute these photos for any lawful purpose. In addition, you waive any right to inspect or approve the finished product wherein my likeness appears. Additionally, you waive any right to royalties or other compensation arising or related to the use of the photo.
You hereby hold harmless, release, and forever discharge ET Williams from all claims, demands, and causes of action which you, my heirs, representatives, executors, administrators, or any other persons acting on my behalf or on behalf of my estate have or may have by reason of this authorization.